out of the freezer, into the oven

26 Jun

As mentioned, we’re having our first FET tomorrow and I was feeling overwhelmed and emotional for a few days as a consequence. It wasn’t (isn’t) because I’m not ready for the FET, it’s the opposite in fact – I’m so ready that the possibility of a negative result is f#cking heartbreaking. I’ve been so positive throughout but suddenly I couldn’t get numbers/percentages/what ifs out of my brain (that Inside the Human Body documentary the other night did not help). And I started talking deserving and undeserving to myself – those comparisons are just stupid, I know it.

So Saturday became Distract Shan Day, starting with a morning walk and coffee at our beach.

Zanne’s unwavering confidence, as usual, has been comforting and encouraging and I woke today with a more “what will be, will be” attitude – in spite of my dream about forgetting our FET appointment. This afternoon I completely gave in to my potty-mouthed uterus and did some baby shopping on Etsy. I purchased this hat, this hat and this print. If you ask me, said shopping is considered positive thinking.

As I write this our little embryo should be out of the freezer and preparing his/her cells for 9 months in my oven (AMAZING!). Be brave little one, we’ll see you tomorrow.

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One Response to “out of the freezer, into the oven”

  1. The Tao of Pig Pen June 26, 2011 at 11:52 pm #

    Good luck. We went down the road and it worked.

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